After being spontaneously blown to bits, Crotchety Oldfart found himself in the casino at Asgard. Settling himself in for an eternity of gambling, Crotchety thought that he had died and gone to heaven. However, old habits die hard, and after a short time he was caught trying to rig the deck and abruptly sent back to the land of the living. Opening his eyes, he sees that he is in Salaam's temple with the Big Bologna himself standing over him. Tully lurks nearby. Tully comes over. "We had you resurrected. We didn't want to leave you behind and all. We are back in Sandas so you can relax here if you want." "You damned fool!" snaps Crotchety. "I wanted to be dead!" He reaches for his cane and bops Tully over the head. "Welcome back," Salaam says. "I need to rest. The majordomo will see you out." He nods to both and then retires to his room as Logan's replacement, a young and attractive elf woman, awaits the duo. Tully and Crotchety head back to Occa's mansion. Late on the morning of August 10th Tully returns...with Crotchety...alive and well. They find Kadlian's group at the mansion as well, which includes a marginally younger version of...Crotchety...who at this point in the timeline is adventuring with that party. "Who are you?" asks the young Crotchety. "You look like me, only not as handsome!" "I'm you, you whippersnapper!" snaps the old Crotchety. Soon they are arguing and squabbling to beat the band. Tully says, "How are there two of you, Crotchety?" "I don't know!" they snap in unison. Darian sighs. "Two of them..." "Who is he?" asks one of them. "He's a wuss," says the other. "I remember now," says the elder Crotchety. "I adventured with that moron Kadlian's group, and I recall meeting...me...here. Then I was kidnapped by space aliens who landed me in bed with a strange drow woman and an even stranger elf. I was with their party for awhile but it was even more boring than Kadlian's. Then I ended up with the wuss and his friends on a space station with a great casino and all these horny babes. That's where I want to go back to...now!" He stamps his foot. "Can I skip all the extraneous and boring crap, cut to the chase and come with you now?" asks the younger Crotchety. "No. You have to suffer awhile and earn your reward!" replies the elder Crotchety. He turns to Tully. "Let's leave before Kadlian starts talking!" You head out to the Steve Jobs and board the ship. In a few minutes you are lifting off. As the ship climbs past the Moon and heads for Alpha Centauri you become aware of another presence in the cabin with you; a high elf, sitting in a lounge chair and resting his feet on the control wheel while he chews on a celery stick. "Hello," says Vardui. Tully says, "Hi Vardui. What brings you aboard?" "Boredom," he says. "Time for some action. Where are we going?" Zanax nods, "Good question. I think off in search of adventure!" Tully smiles. "Yes, adventure, fun, parties, sexy androids and, of course, trying to find Nernals. Any clue on where we might find one?" "You can find adventure just about anywhere," says Vardui. "I've always wanted to visit Rigel." "Why Rigel?" asks Tully. "Why not?" Tully shrugs. "Good enough reason, I suppose. Off to Rigel then!" He says, "Steve Jobs, take us away!" "What about me?" whines Crotchety. "Oh, right. Almada Station and then Rigel," Tully amends. Darian pulls Tully aside the next change he gets. "Aren't you the least bit concerned that there are two Crotchetys running around and we have no idea why?" Tully says, "No, not really. I mean...it is interesting, but why should we care? It is a magical world we are from anyway, although he did mention aliens...hmm, maybe we should ask Almada to check out this older one." "Magical in where there are demons and other creatures that aren't interested in helping our world. I'll ask Zanax to check him for evil, but I think we should be extra careful around Crotchety. And, of course, there's still the question of why we bring him along. As far as I can tell, he's not been able to contribute anything to our quest." "And I take great pride in that fact!" snaps Crotchety. "In that way, you young pointy-eared punk, you are something of a mentor to me!" Darian ignores him. Tully laughs and says, "Why did he want to go back to the station? I can think of a lot of reasons. Plenty of food, drink and willing women. Plus, maybe he can do research for us while he is there and help us in our quest that way." "Research for you? Not on your life! I'm gonna gamble and carouse the rest of my life away!" Tully says, "Well, sure, but you can't do that 100% of the time." "Wanna bet?" Crotchety retorts. Tully laughs. "Well, we will see in 5 years if you can still be doing that for your retirement." "I like his attitude," says Vardui. "Chaotic." "Besides, it isn't for me, it is for the hundreds of billions of creatures that affected by the slow decay of the Nernals. We must find a way to help them." "Maybe you feel compelled to help them but I don't," says Crotchety. "I am a staunch conservative. Everyone for themselves. Laissez-fare and all that. No government handouts!" "Right with you, brother. However, we are anarchists trying to help the people despite the ineptitude of the man!" "No!" says Crotchety, stamping his foot again. "You're a bunch of interfering lefties!" Tully rolls his eyes. "Double time it, Steve Jobs." There is a slight shudder as the ship Jumps.
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