Finally, on July 9th, Kadlian surfaces. Rage is with him. He finds his companions in the front sitting room. They look rather frazzled. Kadlian looks rather wet. With them is a gnome whom he does not recognise.
"Lord Kadlian? Is something amiss?" Galil asks in surprise.
"No, just someone played a practical joke on me. How have you all been?"
"Both Canon Fodder and Occa have been extremely gracious hosts," Galil replies, still giving Lord Kadlian a curious stare.
"Is Rage feeling better?" she asks.
Kadlian addresses the gnome. "I am Kadlian Lun'Folard, a Ranger of Aldacan and leader of this group. May I ask who you are?"
"Yep," says Badd, sticking out a small hand. "I'm Baddenkohrlmspf Herr'Dei."
"Welcome Baddenkohrlmspf Herr'Dei. That is quite a mouthful of a name you have."
"My friends call me Badd," replies Badd with a grin. "Join the club!"
Kadlian laughs. "I would think your enemies would want to call you that as well. To avoid having to stop in the middle of combat to get your name out."
"That's why I only let my friends use it!"
"How do you stop your enemies from using it?"
"Oh, I just don't tell it to them."
As Kadlian reaches for the hand, the gnome whips it back, removes what's obviously a small electrical buzzer hidden in the palm, and extends it again.
"Sorry," he explains. "Almost forgot that one! Kailar's been training me."
Kadlian takes his hand and shakes it. "Kailar has been training you in what?"
"Oh, y'know," replies Badd in an off-hand sort of way. "Gnome stuff."
"Illusionist or thief?"
"Yup," replies Badd. "They tell me you've been meditating. You do that a lot?"
Kadlian shakes his head. "I was not meditating. I was watching over a sick friend. I just was not expecting the illness to last as long as it did. I apologize, everyone, for my absence."
"Oh," Badd shakes his head. "That's hard. I hope your friend is alright."
Badd also notices a rather shy looking young man for the first time, hanging around at the back of the room.
Rage looks to Kadlian. "Of course I am better. Why else would I be here? I was off searching the planes for an honest man, my light out in the night."
"Were you with Rage?" asks Malvis of Kadlian, the shy young man in the corner dressed in wizard robes, his voice almost quaking with emotion. "She's OK, isn't she?"
"Yes, I was. As you can see, she has recovered."
"Yes, Malvis, she is fine," says the mage. "And eager to travel the roads again. I've slept for days now and am refreshed."
"Oh, good," says Malvis, relief showing plainly on his face. "Then I am ready whenever you are."
Realizing he has let his emotions once again conquer his frail persona, Malvis turns to the gnome Badd, and, composing himself with some difficulty, says, "I don't think we have been introduced. I'm Malvis, illusionist extraordinaire, at your service."
He is a young human, dressed in robes, with several wands stuck in his sash.
Badd wanders over, and proffers his hand.
"Badd Herr'Dei, illusionist trÈs ordinaire, at yours," he burbles happily.
Malvis smiles broadly as he shakes the gnome's hand, then asks, "How is your training going? Are you just an illusionist, or do you have other interests you follow?"
"Oh yes, hundreds. Parrots, the study of decomposition of bodies under quicklime, ancient documents written in dwarven runes, disabling deadfall traps...and that's just what's come up since this morning."
"Is Rage fully recovered now? Perhaps some dry clothing would be in order. It seems practical jokes are greatly favored here," Galil says with a small smile.
"So it would appear."
"Actually, what I want is a hot bath. I asked one of the maids for this and all I got was a bucket of cold water dumped over me."
Rage pops up behind Galil, and whispers in her ear "Yup, we're fully recovered now. How about you?"
Galil frowns, turning slowly to face Rage.
"I am fine. Lord Kadlian was ill as well?" she asks, her eyes flitting to Kadlian before returning to Rage.
"No, I just sat and watched over her for five days."
Galil nods. "A good friend. Among my people a difficulty shared is a difficulty halved."
"Well, Rage was out of it, so I was just watching over her."
"Well then among our merry band, we should have like no difficulties at all," says Rage. "Oh, Lord Kadlian... Lord Kadlian, were you sick?"
"Stop it, Rage."
"Where is it, Lord Kadlian, that I may stop it for you?" asks Rage.
Galil frowns slightly, confused. "But you are she, are you not? Or do you, like Occa, have a being similar in appearance?"
"I am me, and me is she." replies Rage, "And we're all ready to go."
"Come together," says Malvis, "right now."
Then he adds, "Sometimes, you see, Rage is more than a mage."
"I like that... More than a Mage," says Rage, "We should get some tee-shirts made up."
Galil looks surprised and asks, "You are fully human?"
"Let me check," the mage says, pulling out a card. "Says here on my broom-license that I am a human. So it must be true, the Witches guild never ever rarely sometimes can make a mistake or two."
Galil raises a brow, smiling at Rage's antics. "Most interesting. I am glad to see that you are feeling better. Your illness seemed quite sudden."
"Oh you know, easy come, easy go," says the mage.
"And did you find this honest man?"
"Nope," replies Rage, "Not yet at least. But I have very specific criteria for my search."
"Is this a man needed for additional magical instruction? Or is he necessary for your mission?" Galil asks. "Perhaps I have some knowledge of this I could share with you."
"What man? I'm famished," Rage says, making a beeline for the table and sitting next to whoever is eating. "Pass the grub."
"Another time then," Galil smiles, a thoughtful expression in her eyes as she watches Rage.
Rage nods as she begins to eat with a vengeance.
"So, where do we go from here, folks? Shall we explore that tower that Hlarn went into with the orcs as Galil suggested while we wait for the other group to find the artifact?"
"Yeah, let's go there. I can teleport us there on the morrow," says Rage, eager to be off again.
"You're gonna go off adventuring? I wish I could go. I hate recruitment drives. They are really boring."
"If you wish to come, you may."
"Hey, watcha recruiting for?" asks Badd.
"The God of Thunder, Thor. Would ya be interested in taking up the hammer in his service?"
Cannon Fodder walks into the room. "What is he paying these days?"
Occa laughs at the comment.
"Another cleric?" says Rage. "Didn't we have some hammer-heads in the group already? Come on, the more the merrier."
Ragnar frowns at the nickname.
"Humor quotient, and manual dexterity," says the mage. "You fail both."
She turns to Kadlian. "Let's keep him. We need a new straight man."
"Does this mean I no longer have to do the job?"
"You can retire, gracefully, my dear." says the mage, "Until that is you make a straight man comment. There are twelve step programs for recovering straight men, you know."
"Twelve steps? I did not realize the condition was so serious."
Thoroughly confused about this exchange, Galil finally asks, "What is a straight man?"
"Hey, you're pretty good at it too," replies Rage, "We could have several, it's always important for comic relief."
"Comic relief?" Galil asks, a slight frown passing over her features as she tries to comprehend. "Perhaps this is a magely custom I am unaware of."
"No, just a Ragely custom."
Galil smiles, "Yes, she is the most colorful human I have yet met. They seem to be much like Gnomes or halflings at times."
"I heard that. I'm not deaf yet, you know," says Rage.
"Actually, more of the illusionist/gnomish school of magic. I have been infected from one of our previous fellow travelers, and sometimes even let it out... Being close to death tends to make one love life more."
"Hammer head, you know, shark, predator of the sea," says the mage. "See Kadlian, a perfect straight man."
"I'm Rage, and I'm often the brains of the outfit. Expect when I fall into a coma for five days, and then I'm not quite sure what happens. Pleasedtameetya."
"Well met."
"Hi," says Badd. "I know the feeling. I've been worrying about my friends back at the towers. They have a tendency to get themselves into all kinds of trouble without me."
"Oh wait, if you are to join us, you must submit to the tests. Sing with me to find the key."
"Put your left foot in.. put your left foot out... put your left foot in and you shake it all about. You do the hokey-pookey and turn yourself about... that's what it's all about," sings the mage, dancing around the room in a fit of something... as if the is summoning something.
"Phew.. All this bed rest makes one eager to go. So what is Thor's opinion on the hokey-pookey? Is it really what it's all about?"
Ragnar looks confused. "What exactly is this supposed to test?"
"Interested? Sure. Tell me about Thor."
"Well, He likes battle and drink. He is the son of the God Odin, Ruler of the Pantheon. He hates Giants. He wields a Hammer of immense power named Mjolner. All of his clerics wield hammers as well."
Ragnar displays his hammer at his belt.
Rage, the short, pierced and tattooed woman with fire-red hair sidles up to Ragnar.
"Say, cleric. Is that a hammer in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?" she says in a vampish voice.
"Well, drinking I can do," says Badd. "And I'm not a big fan of giants."
He reaches into a back pocket and produces a small hammer he uses for knocking iron spikes into walls. "And I have this."
He holds the hammer at arms length, shouts "For Asgard!" and spins round and round... until he bumps into a table leg and falls over.
He sits up, rubbing his head. "Seems like fun. Where do I sign?"
"Let's go to the Temple."
"Back soon," Badd tells Kailar, with a wink.
"Going to the temple and we're gonna get married. Going to the temple and we're gonna get married," sings Rage.
"You're going to get married?" asks Badd. "To Kadlian? Great, I love weddings."
Rage swoons.
"Alas, it is not to be, Kadlian and I are not compatible in that way," says the mage. "It seemed that you were going to get married to Thor, presided by Ragnar."
Cannon Fodder chuckles.
Occa rolls his eyes.
"In what way not compatible?" asks Badd. "He seems like a nice man, you're a pretty lady, I think you'd make a lovely couple. Certainly better than a Blond Thug with a Hammer..." he looks up at Ragnar "Oops! I mean, Revered God of Thunder... and a gnome."
Ragnar turns to look at the Gnome.
"If you are not serious in your commitment to Thor, you should not waste my time. The High Priest will be displeased if it turns out that you are wasting his time as well. Not to mention that it is unwise to mock a God."
"Serious?" asks Badd. He looks up at Ragnar. "This is serious. Lives hinge upon it. Worlds shall collapse and fall. Fimbulwinter comes, chaos is everywhere, Fenris shall swallow the moon."
He jumps up and down, waving his little hammer. "Help, Help, Ragnarok is coming!!!"
"While we care for each other as friends, we are not romantically interested in each other."
Galil's expression changes from one of surprise at the suggestion that Rage and Kadlian are intimate to one of relief that they are not.
"Well, hey, friendship's how it starts," says Badd enthusiastically. "Who knows, a little music, candlelight, oysters... don't you think the world deserves the children you two could have together?"
Kadlian rolls his eyes. "Badd, let it go. If we were interested in each other in that way, we would have already explored that type of relationship."
"Pity," says Badd, his enthusiasm wilting. "I love weddings. When Rage said there was a wedding... well, I thought, how nice. Kadlian and Rage. Lovely."
He sniffs and looks at Rage reproachfully, then sticks his tongue out at her.
"I think that would be most unwise. The ways of elves and humans are on separate paths and should remain so," Galil replies.
"That's what they used to say about gnomes and ettins. Until my Great Uncle Zapperdvelsf met Big Bertha."
Galil can't hide her shudder at this news. "I am quite sure that I do not wish to hear about this."
"It was very sweet. They used to pine whenever they were apart. In spring he would fetch her sweet lilies from the fields, and she would seldom come home of an evening without a pink-blossomed cherry tree for him."
"You disapprove of half-elves, Galil?"
Galil frowns in surprise.
"Disapprove? Why should I disapprove of them?" she asks in surprise.
"From your statement. After all, half-elves have one human and one elven parent."
"You mistake my meaning Lord Kadlian. While I do not personally favor the intimate alliance of Elf and Man, the result of such a union has no choice in the matter and so can not be faulted. It is a tragic fate for all concerned and they have my sincere sympathy. The Elf for his lost love in but the wink of an eye, for the Human who knows that his life is but a very small ripple in time and for the Half-elf as they can not fully claim their human heritage, nor can they fully claim their elven heritage. It would seem to be the worst of all possible choices." Galil replies softly. "But they do say that love is beyond understanding and reason, and so many suffer unendurable fates in such unions."
"I did mistake your meaning, Galil. My apologies. Of course, you do realize that for the more powerful humans, they are capable of extending their lives to even elven spans."
"This is true," says Occa.
Galil nods.
"Yes, for a small handful of humans it is possible." Galil agrees, "Though for most it is not."
"This is true too. Just hook up with an arch-magi and you should be okay." He smiles and winks.
Galil smiles back, "I will keep that in mind."
"Please do. Just remember...."
He clears his throat and says, "Go live with him and be his love and you two all the pleasures prove that valleys, groves, hills and fields, woods or steep mountain yields. And he will make three beds of roses and a thousand fragrant posies. A cap of flowers and a kirtle embroidered all with leaves of myrtle. A gown made of the finest wool which from your pretty lambs you will pull. Fair lined slippers for the cold with buckles of the purest gold."
He chuckles and sips his coffee again.
"Or maybe you guys will just travel the planes and worlds. Who knows?"
Eventually you run out of steam.